Savage / Roast Retirement Wishes for Cousin

Your cousin's finally retiring, and it's time to send them off in style – with a healthy dose of good-natured ribbing! Forget the sappy cards; these savage retirement wishes are perfect for that relative who can truly take a joke and dish it right back.

Choice #1
Savage / Roast
β€œ

Congrats on retirement, cuz! You've finally earned the right to blame all your back pains on 'old age' instead of 'sitting wrong'.

β€œ
Choice #2
Savage / Roast
β€œ

So, you're retiring, huh? Guess someone finally realized you were just warming the chair for the last decade anyway. Enjoy your well-deserved nap!

β€œ
Choice #3
Savage / Roast
β€œ

They say retirement is when you stop living at work and start working at living. Knowing you, it'll just be more excuses not to help move furniture.

β€œ

Not specific enough?

Create a unique, 100% personalized wish for your Cousin in seconds.

Generate with AI
Choice #4
Savage / Roast
β€œ

Happy retirement, cousin! Now you'll have plenty of time to perfect your 'old man/lady grunt' when getting up from the couch. Practice makes perfect!

β€œ
Choice #5
Savage / Roast
β€œ

Wow, you actually made it to retirement! I'm impressed they didn't figure out you were just playing Solitaire all day. Congrats on the successful con!

β€œ
Choice #6
Savage / Roast
β€œ

To my dearest cousin, may your retirement be filled with absolutely nothing productive, just like your last few years at the office. Cheers!

β€œ
Choice #7
Savage / Roast
β€œ

Welcome to the club of the perpetually confused! Congrats on retirement, now you can genuinely forget what day it is and blame it on freedom.

β€œ
Choice #8
Savage / Roast
β€œ

Retirement? I thought you were just taking a really long coffee break. Guess I was wrong. Enjoy never having to pretend to be busy again!

β€œ
Choice #9
Savage / Roast
β€œ

You're retiring? Does this mean I finally get your share of the family inheritance... I mean, now you have more time to spend it wisely?

β€œ
Choice #10
Savage / Roast
β€œ

They say retirement is the beginning of the best years of your life. Which is great, because let's be honest, your working years were pretty questionable.

β€œ

Common Questions

Q.How do I deliver a roast message without offending my cousin?

The key is knowing your cousin's sense of humor. Ensure your message is light-hearted, delivered with a smile, and clearly signals it's all in good fun. A follow-up genuine compliment can also help soften the blow and reinforce your affection.

Q.What if my cousin isn't typically into 'savage' humor?

If your cousin isn't usually a fan of 'savage' or roast humor, it's best to temper the intensity or opt for a more traditional, heartfelt message. You can still include a playful jab, but avoid anything too biting if you're unsure they'll appreciate it.

Q.Should I combine a roast wish with a sincere one?

Absolutely! Pairing a funny, savage roast with a sincere wish shows you care while still having fun. You might start with the roast, then transition to a genuine 'All jokes aside, congratulations, we're so proud of all you've accomplished.'